It’s time for some mind sex, we ain’t got to take our clothes off yet
We can burn the incense, and just chat
Relax, I got the good vibrations
Before we make love let’s have a good conversation
Dead Prez – Mind Sex
Before we go any further, I have a confession to make:
I don’t have a lot of sex.
No really, I just got into double digits not too long ago (penetration-wise anyway). I’m not a prude or anything, it’s just usually not that exciting unless there’s some sort of intellectual/emotional connection. Call me conservative, but I believe sex truly is better with someone you love.
My first love, we never had sex. I blame him. As the standard everyone is judged against, if the mental banter isn’t there I’m not interested regardless of the physicality.
More importantly, I don’t understand the logistics of sorting dating partners by physical appearance.
Let’s say you like big breasts, what happens if your girlfriend gets a reduction?
Or what happens if you prefer really big dicks and the biggest one you’ve come across happens to be attached to a complete idiot with bad body odor. Is it worth it?
I see so many people fixated on particular body parts/physical characteristics and it doesn’t pragmatically make sense to me. Don’t get me wrong, I have tastes just like everyone else, that’s not what I’m saying.
For example, as mentioned before, I keep running into these guys who are fixated on if I cum a lot. It’s an extension of the virility associated with the hypermasculine stereotype of black men. And I’m like, “Does it matter…what if I don’t cum a lot? Is that a dealbreaker?”
Often times it is.
Yes Dorothy, it’s not enough just having a big penis these days.
Besides, what is a lot of semen anyway? Like a tablespoon? More? No one quantifies these things, how am I supposed to do a performance evaluation if you don’t specify the criteria for judgment.
It’s gotten so bad to the point I have to lie about my degree/profession because people get these crazy “Oh you have a degree in sex, you must be good at it” expectations.
Thanks for the added pressure!
Truth is I like talking about sex more than having it. And if we’re going to do anything physical, I choose quality over quantity any day of the week.
Unless I need to get off.