It’s Cool

Run away with me

Hope that’s cool
Cause I’m really not trying to
Impose but I suppose that
I’m supposed to be here
With you
With eyes as sad as mine I think you’ll find
You need me just like I need you, yeah

But it’s cool
We ain’t gotta be nothing
It’s true
I’d actually prefer it, yeah
It’s on you, it’s on you, it’s on you
It’s on you, it’s on you, it’s on you
It’s on you, it’s on you, it’s on you
It’s on you, cause I’m cool

Jhene Aiko – It’s Cool

To the One That Got Away,

So many things have happened the last few years; joy, disappointment, miscommunication…

…but I keep going back to the first time we met. It’s really the only time I had you alone.

You were more beautiful than I could imagine. It’s not often I’m impressed (let alone speechless). As I sat across that table I couldn’t help fixate on a piece of pie hanging on the corner of your mouth. I wanted to take my thumb, ever so gently and whisk it away. Before I did other things with that bottom lip.

Do you remember what you said when I could no longer help myself and explicitly hit on you? It’s etched in my brain forever.

“I don’t think my boyfriend would like that.”

I could tell by your smile you didn’t have a problem with the thought…with the possibilities “we” could result in.

And I’ve played the game long enough to know desire does not equal a relationship. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t disappointed we didn’t get to talk it out; compare needs, discuss ambitions…see if there was any overlap. In my heart of hearts I think it could’ve worked. But the baggage, the trauma we both bring to the situation won’t let us be great.

I never thought you were Superman. I didn’t seek you out to save me. I just wanted a chance…an opportunity to verify what I already knew; the love we share is pure. And rare. And undeniable.

There’s so much I want to say, but I don’t want to belabor this. Your boy seems likes a nice guy. You seem happy even.

But we both know it’s a very safe decision.

To be clear, I wish nothing but the best for you. If you truly believe he’s what you want/need at the moment, I hope you’re right (for everyone’s sake).

Because desire (like that) doesn’t go away.

Not when the connection is that genuine. Not when the energy is handed down from the universe. You can’t repress that kind of yearning.

Ask your friend Boston Boy (he knows).

Besides, you’re brilliant. On a certain level I think that’s why you’ve done your best to not be alone with me after that. Unfortunately (for both of us), my powers extend beyond the physical.

I know you’re busy; new job, new city…starting over is hard work, trust me. Best of luck with that.

If I have any hope it’s one day I can sit across from you again, without all the noise and distractions and we can figure out a plan to sit in the sun together…if only for a moment.

Because that’s how I prefer to see us.

Love,

Tony

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