Tag Archives: Chase Adair

Quotes of the Week: Caviar Ratchet

Photo Jan 09 11 59 06 AM

“I’d fuck him but he couldn’t spend the night.”
commenter Jai (the man with the plan)
Lucas Entertainment Hires Hung Argentinian Model Who Apparently Killed His Father and Brother (The Sword)

I don’t know, I guess they should be more down to fuck since their holes were made for pounding.
omg what?!
(Gary shenanigans)

Fixing your physical image just to choose the same niggas who rejected you in the first place…

Julianne Moore should’ve won for yelling “suck my dick” at that pharmacist in Magnolia.
@captain_fuck via Twitter

Appreciating Jordan Sparks’ sense of humor more every day.

LoL. Someone said the blacks watched Empire and the African-Americans watched Blackish.

I’m not sure if Bill Cosby is guilty or not, but I DO know that y’all have been letting Roman Polanski and Woody Allen live for almost 40 years.
Vinnie Paz via Twitter

If you’ve been “falsely accused” of drugging & raping women, it’d PROBABLY not be a good idea to go on stage & tell jokes about it.
Franchesca Ramsey via Twitter

Job descriptions be like “Must be fluent in 5 languages, able to work 60+ hours a week, have 3 degrees. $10/hr”
Kitty Azalea via Twitter

Yeah, I was one of the Lost Boys myself, out here putting a price on my body, but what the hell. How long was I supposed to go without any sex? If I can’t get it for free, why not get paid for it?
When You’re Strange (Gilded Moments: Confessions of a Gay Nympho)

Imagine if we loved each other the way some people love Beyoncé.
Donovan with a point.

Accountability is essential. I can’t rock with you if you can’t be person enough to hold yourself accountable; I don’t trust that.
Why Chase and I get along

Protect your joy. Defend your dreams. Stay humble. Sometimes it’s that simple.
alex elle via Twitter

Review: Dear Dad

DearDad8PP SocialMediaPoster WatchItToday

Remember the documentary we told you about last year? It’s finally here and I’m happy to say it delivers as promised!

Dear Dad follows eight Black gay/same gender loving men tasked with writing a letter to their father. They discuss aspects of manhood and how their relationship with their father (or lack thereof) helped shaped their identity.

Director Chase Simmons assembled a great cast including Kevin Dwayne (one of my favorite YouTubers) and Gee Smalls (spoiler alert: who had a wife?!) They all have different stories, but it’s interesting to see common themes including expectations of masculinity, religion and internalized homophobia. One of the most interesting things to me was (if my count is right) only one cast member openly came out of the closet to their father. I remember in my masters program I was amazed by how many of the guys were outed by other people growing up.

Being the sex master I am, if I had any critique, I wanted to hear more about the guy’s sex life. I know some of the cast members are HIV+ from their other work; it would’ve been nice to hear questions regarding whether the relationship with their dad contributed to sexual risk behavior and sexual initiations. But like Ryan and Matthew from ADTV (who’s similar videos have subsequently been taken down) I can understand people don’t want to be the face of HIV (especially if they don’t work in public health.

Simmons adds layers to the narrative that are not only effective, but also relevant. The men have to read their letters at a location relevant their story. Some also talk about possibly giving their letters to their father, which opens another important discussion and healing.

Dear Dad should be required viewing for anyone who works with or loves Black gay/bisexual men. I’ve seen several works exploring this phenomenon in heterosexual identified Black men (Brick City being the example that sticks out), but few dealing with queer men.

You can watch Dear Dad at deardad.tv

There’s a great interview with Simmons (by Yolo Akili) at Black Voices.

And HuffPost Live had a great segment with Simmons, Akili and some of the cast to discuss the project. You can watch it here.

Spotlight: Dear Dad

“I don’t have a relationship with him. In order to have a relationship, I guess you have to relate.”
– Dear Dad

During the 2011 National HIV Prevention Conference, I attended a presentation by the ever sexy, always brilliant Dr. David Malebranche. He talked about father-son relationships with black gay/bisexual men in a recent study he conducted in Atlanta. Most of the participants he interviewed had negative/non-existent relationships with their biological fathers which lead to maladaptive behaviors as adults and ultimately HIV risk.

In essence, absence as trauma.

I never thought of it like that. When I hear people talk about never meeting their bio dad or crazy stories of parents actively sabotaging their children, I’m like, “people really do that? That really happens?” (my middle class privilege)

I’m ambivalent about my father. He was physically (and financially) there growing up, but never emotionally. He didn’t seem to like my mother very much. I wouldn’t be surprised if he was gay. A story for another time. But I harbor no active hatred towards him.

As Trent Jackson often says, the first relationship you observe (read: learn to model) is your parents. If dad was never there, how does that affect your interpersonal relationships as an adult? How can you trust other men when you can’t even trust your own father?

Dear Dad, a new film by Chase Adair (also in Atlanta) seeks to explore those questions and more.

It’s a timely piece, especially considering we still have to deal with parents pulling stunts and shows with their LGBT youth, leaving them to fend for themselves at a young age. No one should have to go thru that.

Check out the trailer above and please donate to the Kickstarter if you can. This film needs to be released to the masses.