Tag Archives: Grindr

Quotes of the Week: March Madness

Powerrangerromp

(To Puerto Rican colleague)
Yeah, I can’t really drink vodka, it fucks with my stomach.
I can’t drink vodka cause it fucks with my emotions. (Oop!)

(straight boy friend dating older woman)
…besides her liver spots, she’s awesome!

A hooker, like a magician never reveals her tricks.
Cosigning with Chester Orlino

If you are letting someone hit your snatch’s bullseye with raw semen darts, don’t be surprised when they score!
Shane B. Johnson – Fugitive Wanted For Intentionally Spreading HIV to Hundreds of Gay Men in Tri-State Area (Son of Baldwin)

Walgreens after dark
H/T Cord Jefferson

Which one is better for a young, black, gay man looking for friendship: jack’d or grindr?
Um, the library maybe?

Hell is needing lube but having your ex work at the only adult store in town.
Jeremy with Central Valley Boy Problems

“I Knew You Were Trouble When You Walked In” is my favorite Taylor Swift song about a racist shop owner.
Chase Mitchell via Twitter

Prince Royce is the Frank Ocean of Spanish music.
Cosign

When it comes to Rihanna, I usually just wish we can skip to the drug overdose and be done with her. She makes a catchy tune though.
Mr. Jones gives the best compliments

If gays say “boy pussy” do lesbians say “girl dick?”
Dawn Budgie with a good question

To put that into context: More people visit WorldStarHipHop.com than CBS.com (#200) and New York Daily News (#232.)
[Wow!]
Viral video of beating puts WorldStarHipHop on hot seat (The Grio)

The most dangerous people on this planet are those who just sit and watch what is going on.
Paulo Coelho

Black people don’t dream up ways to kill White people. We just wanna be free. That’s all.
LoveMySkip via Twitter

Shit Bottoms Say

bigwood.png

Simba has some interesting friends. They seem to be just as blunt as he is.

blast.PNG

I’m sorry, I’ve aged out of the cool kid demographic. What did he want exactly? To be fucked? Just my cum (I get that a lot)? Fisting? And who do I have to screw to get a decent greeting these days?

horny.PNG

I appreciate the honesty (and compliment), but when you can’t even spellcheck one sentence, it just seems like you’re foaming at the mouth and that’s never attractive.

nicehole.jpg

He’s what I like to call a “fussy bottom.” If you can’t follow directions online, you probably won’t be able to follow directions in bed which means we wouldn’t have worked out anyway. Besides, don’t they have cameras in everything these days? Microwaves, bicycles…EVERYTHING? In my experience, people who don’t keep a face pic readily available tend to be (1) butt ugly, (2) married/ultra DL or both. Too bad, he really did have a nice ass.

intriguing.jpg

You’re worried about a big butt and a smile? Never trust someone who calls you “intriguing” after midnight.

Quotes of the Week: Time Flies When You’re Having Fun

demotivational-hadoken.jpg

I think I just shot a hadouken out of my penis.
That can’t be good Damon!

Ask me about my weiner!!!!
If you insist Dante

Are you a bottom?
For the right price.
Ewww you have sex for money?
Ewww you have sex for free?
Oh Adrian

Yeah, it’s not cute that he’s trying to be kinky in his sleep. Timing is everything.
The best advice of the year from omniphiliac

Every time Grindr posts about marriage equality an angel loses his hard-on.
Jessica Halem via Twitter

So there’s a show called The Joy Of Teen Sex? Our society is completely fucked. And this is coming from a porn site.
Tube8 via Twitter

I love seeing bottoms in Jordan.
Steven has interesting fetishes

Dammit, I found another co-worker on A4A!
How do you think I feel? Every time I go on Grindr on my lunch hour all I see are men in my building who look straight.

Nothing says I love you, like paying for the abortion.
A friendly reminder from Jiz

How much of a hurry do you have to be in to have to rely on Siri to find an abortion clinic? That feels like a “sit down and type” question.
Paul Carr via Twitter

How sure are we that pepper spray is any worse than the regular ambience of a crowded Walmart?
John Gruber with a good question

Living Social is offering the following deal: five Big Macs and five large fries for $13. Does it come with a free angioplasty?
I’m lovin it Alicia Jessop

Choosing between Real Housewives of Atlanta or The Soul Train Awards is like choosing between genital warts or chlamydia.
Lonnell doesn’t like what’s on Black TV

I’d like to thank my time line for reminding me Tyler Perry has another show. I’d also like to judge you all for watching it.
UptownNotes.com via Twitter

TJ Holmes leaves CNN for BET. BET doesn’t have any news shows, so he’s becoming the front news man for an entire network. Or he could have a three-episode stint on the new season of The Game, only time will tell.
My money’s on the latter Karsh

Kelly Clarkson endorses Ron Paul; no word yet on whether this will be offensive to her African-American fan.
No, I wasn’t offended John

Just like a job, when it’s comes to friendships, you can’t keep the title if you are slacking on your duties.
Sounds good Kevin

Sometimes your biggest mistake isn’t falling for them, it’s thinking they fell for you too.
C’mon somebody!

The closer we get to our destination, the more people we seem to leave behind.
Ernest Greene III via Twitter

Quotes of the Week – Old Habits Die Hard

At least he paid for it. 🙁
commenter nooz – 70-year-old Queens prison chaplain arrested for paying inmate for oral sex (NY Daily News)

I’ve spent more time on the toilet than I have in vaginas this week.
under the weather adult video actor Keiran Lee

Holy god I’m drooling at these Andrew Garfield Spiderman pics.
Oh I’m doing much more than drooling Jonathan

AndrewGarfieldcakes.jpg

If you meet someone, ask their last name; it makes it easier to find them on Facebook.
Stalker 101 from ilikejoaquin

So I just found a bag of weed in front of a church….Lord is that you?
Urban Prince via Twitter

(At home after a night out, talking to a 20-year old on Grindr at 3am)
How was the club?
Couple of fuckables, no real cuties though
Lmao
What you doin? Watching Nick Jr.?
WTF

The people in Cali put avocado in everything! I didn’t tell you to put it in my omelette and it wasn’t in the description. Refund please!
I feel your pain Bradley Cloud

Hipster is a social construct.
Cord Jefferson via Twitter

Ugh, this Scope flavor is nasty. It tastes like…the aftertaste reminds me of cum.
Why do you think I bought it?!

Why are you crying? I’m the one getting raped!
True Blood – I’m Alive and On Fire

I just went through a really bad breakup, so this is perfect!
sex toy winner at the NSRC Summer Institute cocktail party

Girls are like the police. They might have all the evidence in the world, but they still want you to confess.
BrownGirlProblems
(I must be a girl then)

I don’t understand Americans. We’ll rise up when Netflix increases prices, but stand down when actual atrocities present themselves.
Mr. Jones speaking the truth

The best kind of education is experience.
Pat Flynn